I am sitting alone in a friend’s house writing this. I spent
the last few days in Dallas, visiting with friends and family and letting my
spirit renew itself. Tomorrow morning, New Year’s Day, I will drive the ten
hours back to Rolla just in time to accompany my mother to the doctor’s office
(nothing major).
I haven’t taken the time to process yet what I want 2014 to
be, but I know that I want it to be BIG. I have so much that I want to
accomplish: things to do, projects to finish, books to read, stories to write,
and places to go. I know that New Year resolutions are often forgotten by the
first week of February, but I am determined to get some things done. It’s time
to live my dreams.
2013 wasn’t the worst year, though. I got a promotion and
became the Director of the Butler Catholic Community. I finished my MA and
graduated from Notre Dame. I interned at the White Violet Center and
experienced true healing in my intern community while living with my sisters
for a month. I finally became a Providence Associate. I applied for PhD
programs, visited Dallas twice, KC once, saw friends who I had long missed, and
met a new baby cousin (Teytin). I even started my own Etsy page.
Probably the most extraordinary thing about 2013 is that
even though I was given abundant blessings, I know that I was most often
unhappy—and seemingly for no reason. But instead of being sad because of
depression or grief, I think that I was uncomfortable and felt myself becoming
more and more aware that I am not where God wants me to be. And here I am,
leaping again into transition.
For those who know me best, you already know that I don’t
really make NY Resolutions and instead do these things on my birthday (Jan 15),
so for now I will just share this request: please pray for me. I don’t do well
in transitions and I think this will be a big year. Only God knows what 2014
will bring.
